argumate:

nostalgebraist:

help-mywife:

help, my wife is napping and i miss her but she deserves her rest

If you replace “wife” with “fiancee,” and “napping” with “sleeping after going to bed early,” this is me rn

if you replace “wife” with “master Frodo” and “napping” with “sleeping after Elvish surgery following an incident with a cursed Morgul blade” this is Sam Gamgee rn

(via heedra)

chickenoftheday:

hildawhite:

banksy is so funny how do you gentrify vandalism

(via uglytshirt)

hoechlin:

lubricates:

feelingmyoatss:

Me when Sandra Bullock and Sarah Paulson turned out to be sisters and not lesbians:

same feeling HAHAHHAA

(via gizmoera)

trainthief:

medusabraids:

….they really had sex on that mountain with absolutely no lube

Me as a local trapper in 1903 seeing Teddy Roosevelt and John Muir return from a three day backpacking trip through Yosemite and then hearing Roosevelt granted it national park status immediately after

(via mogatrat)

todaysbird:

i can’t express how badly i just want to Squeeze a bullfinch…they’re so round…so Firm…i just want to HOLD one you know

(via typhlonectes)

worldsworstfather:

merry christmas to gay people only

(Source: hexglyphs, via swarnpert)

slab-o-meat:

slab-o-meat:

slab-o-meat:

all those chickens frm chicken run are lesbians. especially that one bitch. you know who im talking about

even when i was 5 watching this movie when it came out i was like …whoa. this chicken has got something good going on

the fact that several people reblogged this thinking that i was talking about different chickens only cements that everyone in that movie is a lesbean

(via uglytshirt)

kylos-manbun:

When it’s days past the nsfw ban and there’s still pornbots everywhere

(via kadaransmuggler)